I almost feel guilty saying it, because I know that so many stepfamilies struggle during the holidays and Thanksgiving is the kickoff to it all. But this year, our first Thanksgiving as an "official" stepfamily, was the best Thanksgiving ever.Part of the reason it was so special was because we are all acutely aware that this may be the last Thanksgiving we all spend together as the family that we know. My grandfather has been in and out of the hospital the past month; at one point, there was one big scare where the doctors needed to know what was in his will. Luckily, he's doing great but the fact remains that he has been living with cancer for two years and he nearly died a few weeks ago. It wasn't lost on us that we never know when our number is up, and that we are very lucky to have Gramps here.
Then, of course, there was the fact that we had the whole family present. The Husband (who didn't have to leave mid-way through dinner), The Kid, my mother-in-law (who has always been invited but never actually made it), all the usual suspects from my immediate family and the various misfits who have become like members of the family over time. The day was full of smiles, laughs and genuine holiday cheer.
I was a bit nervous that The Kid would be bored, grumpy or otherwise teenager-ish. You see, he's never spent an actual holiday with us. But he had a blast. He got "drunk" on IBC rootbeer, schooled my sister in Catchphrase and wished every spoonful of corn he ate farewell with a cheerful, "See you tomorrow!" (Ew.)
In fact, when The Husband left in the evening to take his mother home, The Kid insisted on staying with us to help clean up and play games. I was in awe, that he wanted to stay in a house with a family he's only known for a few years, an hour away from our home, with no members of his bio-family present. I was also nervous - what if he had an attitude attack and I was the only one there to discipline him? (I'm rarely put in the position of disciplining unless it is a safety issue.) We stayed late, played games, ate dessert (and more dessert and more...you get the idea) then rocked out to Dead Kennedys on the ride home.
Friday, both my brother and my sister called to say how much fun they had. One of the misfits called to ask if my parents would adopt him. My dad (the most highly-critical individual I've ever met) called to say it was the best T-day he's had in a long time. As a stepkid himself, he hyper-analyzes everything I do as a stepparent and on Friday he told me I'm doing a great job. Score!
Friday night was also the first time The Kid has ever acknowledged me as his stepmom. He always refers to me as a shortened version of my name, and I'm okay with that (even though I generally hate it when people use a shortened version of my name!). A few times, when introducing me to his friends, he has become flustered with what to call me and I usually just interject and say my name. Friday, I was introduced (dare I say happily?) as "my stepmom."
This Thanksgiving was a happy one indeed, and it seems that this holiday season sees our family feeling more and more like a family with every passing day.
I hope you all found something to be thankful for, even if simply a full glass of wine!
