This picture is totally unrelated to this post. It's just a happy place I go to when I'm frustrated.I didn't post this earlier because I needed some time to think about it. I thought maybe I would calm down a bit. But the more I think about it, the angrier I get.
Alas, I bring it to you.
In last week's FB stalking, I noticed The Ex had put up some photos on her FB page. Generally, I don't click on the photos but I noticed that two of the photos were of my husband. So, of course, I clicked. She had taken a bunch of pictures of him with her cell phone at one of The Kid's sports games. Without him knowing. Some of the pictures didn't even have The Kid in them.
I remember that particular day clearly because she and I were left standing about 10 feet from one another, each pretending the other didn't exist. I thought to myself, "This is just stupid," and started to walk over to her to say hi.
Do you know what she did? She spun on her heel and walked away. Turning her back to me. And that moment right then was when she took all those covert cell phone pictures.
This happened over three months ago. She just put the pictures up last week.
Is that fucked up?
Firstly, my husband didn't even know she was taking pictures of him. Second, The Kid isn't even in some of the pictures! Third, she's done nearly everything to strip him out of The Kid's life - changing The Kid's last name, denying visitation for two years, endless court battles over stupid shit. Now that she has a fiance and wants to get private time with him, all of the sudden it's like none of that shit ever happened? WTF?! Not to mention that if I were Future Stepdad, I would be irritated. There aren't even any pictures of Future Stepdad up!
I tried to to rationalize - maybe she's just trying to show all her friends that The Husband is not the deadbeat she made him out to be (so that she can justify pushing him off on us all the time)? Maybe she's just trying to put those pictures up for The Kid's sake? Maybe she knows I creep her FB page and wanted to see if I would say anything?
I did let The Husband know, and he was very upset that there were pictures of him on FB (he doesn't have an account, and even I only have three photos of us on my account). We decided the subject is not worth broaching. I'm letting it go, but before I do, I want some feedback from my sister stepmoms. What do you think?
Oh, and for the record, I will not be checking her Facebook any longer. Not worth it.
17 comments:
You could report the photos to Facebook. This happened to my stepdaughter one time when a friend stole her picture and posted it as his own.
I think it's kind of funny that she doesn't have any pictures of her fiance. Is she ashamed of him?
I wouldn't say anything, but like Sharon said, report them..
And is IS weird to have pics of your ex & not your fiance.. Is he ugly??
I was like you, always checking Facebook and I deleted her and gave it all up a while ago and it has been the most wonderful feeling. Truly, ignorance is bliss. :)
@ Sharon and Carol, here's a funny story for you:
I went to lunch with my coworker a few months back. We were standing in line and my coworker goes, "Look at that guy over there! He looks like Sloth from Goonies!" I love the movie Goonies so I spun around to see..."Sloth" holding hands with The Ex. I almost peed my pants. My coworker had no idea that was The Ex. I don't think he's ugly, but he's definitely not typically good looking.
LMAO, Sloth?!?
I would report the pictures on FB... I am pretty sure it is annonymous.
Otherwise, I would have Hubby e-mail her and say it has come to my attention you took some pictures without my knowledge and have posted them online. Please remove them, and in the future, please ask my permission before posting pictures of me, as I would do the same for you.
I had to Google "Sloth" to jog my memory and that was frightening!
I agree with everyone else. FB policy says that you have to have someone's permission to post pictures of them. Without that permission, they are not supposed to post those pix. Report them and have them removed. What she's done is a little freaky to say the least.
And I don't know that I'd stop sleuthing (or stalking as you call it). Not if she's doing things like this.
Goonies is one of our rainy day movies... Good to know that Sloth was able to find happiness in the world... ;) even if it is with the wicked witch...
oh wait... sorry... no wait... maybe not... um... poor sap...
ROFL!!
I stopped the FB "stalking" thing too & it IS nice to live in ignorance... because even if they are being nasty, I can't exactly control it, so why bother with the stress of it??
I was trolling Thistle's page for a long while because we were getting very usable court information off of it, but it was making me nuts and po'd every time I looked at it.
So I did this....I have a very good friend who volunteered herself to do the checking for me. If it's something of no value that would only tick me off, she just doesn't tell me about it. If I'm looking for something in particular or if she finds something that would be valuable court-wise, she prints it off for me. It has been WONDERFUL for me. And I owe this friend dearly : )
I think you made the right decision because you definitely don't want to give away that you are stalking her FB page.
I also would just let it go because it just makes her look stupid.
and if she is doing it to get a reaction, then it will be funny when she doesn't.
I would also keep stalking just to get info
I don't think you're overreacting at all. I do think it's really strange that she'd be posting pics of your hubby on her FB page though. However, I agree.. it's not worth your time, but do report it.
The Wicked Witch sent me a friend request just the other day - but I ignored. As much as I'd love to be able to see her stuff (for various reasons), I don't think it's worth my time right now. I do like Tulip's idea. :)
OK, that just sounds crazy. Why in the world would someone post pictures of their ex and just their ex? I could see if the Kid was in them and she just wanted to post some happy pictures, but just random pics she took at a game with her cell phone? Also, why was she taking his picture with her cell anyway? That is just SO strange. I would be irritated too.
I hate FB for BM stuff. I couldn't resist looking at her stuff, and then saw how people were saying what an awesome mother she is. Made me sick considering she's never doing anything for or with the kids. She posts one picture from 2 years ago and she's a saint. I don't look anymore. Used to get me too riled up.
I agree with Sharon...report her. I also don't think you should admit to stalking...just in case you want to continue and need any info she posts. It is hard to balance a "healthy" stalking relationship. haha When it starts to consume you everyday it is probably no longer healthy.
I think it is strange that she would post his pics but maybe she is testing you to see if you are stalking her...who knows. In our case, every time I try to outguess the X I get it wrong and it only hurts me.
@Tulip - great idea! I think I will enlist a good friend to do that for me.
I don't think I'll report them, as it will probably be obvious who did it, even if it is anonymous, and they aren't bad pictures. I'm just so irritated with her. Thanks for letting my know I'm not crazy though...you guys rock!
xo
And after reading this I'm glad to know that I'm not crazy by letting things she writes or says to the kids annoy me. While we haven't ever seen her posting pictures of either of us, she does only click on the pictures on my blog that have my fiancé (her ex) in them. Never of pictures of the kids. It's annoying, but I just rationalize it as she finally realized she let a good thing go. . . the grass isn't always greener on the other side.
Sorry for being so late but I just read this post and had to make a comment. WTF? Seriously why does she have pics of your husband on her facebook? That is COMPLETELY weird. I wouldn't say a word to her but I would report every single one of those photos. It is not her job to post pictures of her ex or her ex with their son. That is completely crazy to me. You would think the finace would not be digging that, but who knows.
I too have stopped the FB stalking. Some time last week before I left for my work trip I just said enough. I am sick of wasting my time looking at this crap and none of it matters. Its just a bad habit and ignorance is complete bliss. I blocked her and every person I used to look at related to her in some way. Its only been a week but I feel better. I still get the urge to check but I am hoping I can hold out and end up forgetting about it all together. Hugs to you, sorry she is so annoying. I would let it blow past and block her ASAP.
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