This is what I heard while loading my gym bag into the car yesterday afternoon. I looked up expecting to see some middle school girls gossiping about another teenager in the parking lot.
Only to see The Ex's mother.
Talking about me.
Two cars away from mine.
She proceeded to whisper viciously to her husband while keeping The Royal Stinkeye on me.
Lady, You. Are. In. Your. Sixties. Getthefuckoverit.
Yes, I'm diligently reading Forgive for Good and practicing the release of my anger and hurt. But in this moment, all I wanted was to grab my copy of the book and smack her right upside the head with it. Over and over and over again.
I did not break up the marriage; it was done and over before I even moved to this place. I had absolutely nothing to do with that shitshow of a relationship. All I have done is bite my lip and love and support The Husband and The Kid in the face of assaults, verbal and otherwise.
As I drove out of the parking lot she stared me down, poking her husband's side and snarling all the while. I was so upset I was shaking, and when I got home I cried. I felt like I had been bullied, even though we didn't really interact.
It sucks to know she freely and openly trashes me in front of The Kid. It sucks to keep my mouth shut. It sucks to be hated for absolutely no reason.
Hate is not a family value. If nothing else, I hope we can instill that in The Kid. Because he's clearly not getting it from them.
8 comments:
Ouch. I'm sorry. Evidently it's still a fresh wound to the Ex's family. Like most wounds, time will help heal and it will get better. In the meantime, just ignore the bitch.
I'm sorry, too! Hug, hug, hug.
I agree with Mean Stepmom: just ignore her.
A similar thing happened to me when I met my stepkids' grandmother (hence the ex's mom). She came to pick them up late afternoon one week day. I was off from work so I came over to my boyfriend's house to take care of The Young One, who had bronchitis. I held his in my arms saying "look who's there, my love? It's Grandma!" She was confused and said: "Oh! you must be the cleaning lady!"
It wasn't intentionally mean, (unlike you), but it's still clumsy-not-nice.
Yipes, sorry that happened. There's something about treated that way that is still really hurtful, even if we don't like (or really even know) the other person....
And "the cleaning lady?" Too horrible, but also funny! (Hopefully) :-)
Ignore her I shall (try). Thanks!
The Ex's family NEVER liked The Husband...through their 5 years of dating and 3 years of marriage and 2 years of separation, they gave him nothing but HELL. He thinks that she's just trying to get to him through me...and if that's the case I'm sure not giving her the power to do so.
Maratrejoyeuse - so sorry about your experience! Hopefully things have gotten better?
This was just a few months ago... I'm a new stepmom too.
Many years of extended family bliss ahead ;-) !
@ Jen : Yeah... it's funny!
Sometimes, denial is so strong with some people that it gets to the point where it's funny !
The ex's mother helped her daughter stalk me, harrass me, did everything she could to aleinate my husband's children from him and me, even helping his daughter to write vicious letters to her father. This sixtysomething-yr-old witch even came to the front door of our first halloween party and mooned us and our guests by dropping trough to her shoes and bending over and grabing her ankles.
Yesterday we found out that she just had a severe stroke and is most likley paralyzed for life and cannot speak. I cannot bring myself to feel bad. I've tried and know I should. But I cannot feel bad for her. Karma, I guess.
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